I’m sorry. Sorry that some of your inhabitants don’t get to experience the full spectrum of emotions that come with living in a densely ethnic area. That some people will have to live their entire lives in a comfortably insular bubble in which they don’t have to question the cultural norms they subscribe to. Mainly I’m sorry that I don’t get to be one of these blissfully unaware folk. Not that I dislike diversity, but anyone from L.A. or N.Y. can agree on one thing- those Persians are A LOT. If you didn’t grow up around light-bulb dancing and tadig, you might be wondering who I mean to offend and why. Thankfully, the kind people at Bravo have continued to confront otherwise oblivious people with the premiere of the second season of “Shahs of Sunset”. As a (non-Persian) gal from Great Neck, you better believe I gave into the hype first season and lapped up the drama of Persian princesses dueling alongside overly-gelled Iranian jesters. It was like being in High School again, only these characters are located in Beverly Hills and in their 30’s and 40’s. Lucky for my nostalgic cravings though, apparently what Persians lack in emotional maturity they make up for in physically aging prematurely, so I was able to tune in where I left off in teenhood.
ANYWAY, back to the premiere episode. The Farsis came back in their fully mustached form, ready to wreak havoc and drink the Sahara dry as always. In this first episode, we were introduced to Reza’s newest obsession, Lilly. They say everything’s bigger in Texas but whoever came up with that line must have been severely ignoring this Middle-Eastern troop. It’s obvious that this girl was meant to move to the west coast, considering the hoards of her own who immigrated there after the war in the 70’s. Even her name proves her belonging to the Valley. But most of all, girl needs bikini weather.
We also caught up with Reza, the Freddie Mercury lookin’ ball of flaming far-Eastern fire who is apparently now in a not so serious relationship “with a white dude”. Perhaps to draw further from the well of stereotypes, Reza went to a tea-leaf reader who let him know not so subtly that she had the feeling he wasn’t being too faithful. There’s always your mustache to keep ya warm, bb.
And what’s Shahs without the Persian Princess of Pop herself, Asa? Besides the obvious fat-bottomed girls jokes I could make (Freddie Mercury reference again?), or the fact that she equated the former nickname to having a PhD, I can’t hate on the girl. This intergalactic Persian Priestess had a tumultuous life and I can totally relate to her identity issues. Anyone who makes diamond water and is so bold as to tell her parents that being an ~artist~ is her job is fine by me.
On the opposite end of the spectrum we have G.G., who just went on about guns and knives some more. Oh, she also got trashed with her new buddy Omid (who is her real-time fiance) in an attempt to get Mike jealous, which failed because he kept on talking about the real estate market and bitches from Vegas. Good stuff.
As always, Bravo never fails.