Yo, Dexter my man! I know, it's been a while, how ya been buddy? Look, I know I kind of ditched you at a bad time, with you finding your wife dead and all. To be fair, you then went running around with that ho Lumen (seriously, who names their kid Lumen? Hippies?) and I kind of lost all hope for you. But it's totes cool now, I'm back! So how have things been, pal?
Dexter, you crazy f***, what are you doing!? Deb, what the hell are you doing!? Dex, having one parent that's a serial killer is already bad enough, but WTF are you thinking bringing Hannah in? What is Harrison suppose to say on Career Day? "Yeah, my dad and stepmother are serial killers. I really wish they'd get me that PS3 I've been asking for."
Not so fast, Deb, I'm throwing you some shifty eyes as well. You've done a real good job of getting Dexter to stop killing people since you discovered who he really is (that's sarcasm, by the way.) I don't like this Hannah chick either, she annoys the hell out of me, but something is telling me she didn't slip those drugs into your water bottle.
Another thing, Deb. Being in love with your brother? Not cool, bro, not cool by a long shot. Look, I get that you guys aren't actually related by blood, but it's still creepy as all hell that the man you grew up thinking was your brother is now your love interest? This is all starting to sound very Maury Povich to me. "I'm in love with my serial killer brother, but I need his serial killer girlfriend out of the picture so I'm going to poison myself to set her up."
You've gotten sloppy, Dex. Real sloppy. Sloppier than Sloppy Joes (damn, now I'm hungry). LaGuerta is on to you, dude. She made sure the last of your mother's killers got on parole, just to watch you go after him.
What? NO YOU CAN'T JUST KILL LAGUERTA! Jeeeeeeezus, Dex. Take your dad's advice and pack it up and run. Take Harrison and Deb, change identities and go to like, Switzerland. I hear it's nice their this time of year.
Shit. Someone is definitely going to die.